Breakfast..... for Dinner?!?!?!?!

First off, fuck the steelers. Notice I didn't capitalize that even though it's a name.
What a fucking game.

But I digress, fuck the steelers.

Ok, I'm done for real this time. To the food! Yesterday was all about America and raping the rapist-led steelers, but tonight's dinner was all about Mexico.

I walked into my house to bacon frying on the stove. This is always a good sign as far as I'm concerned. If someone came in and murdered my family, but left bacon frying on the stove, I'd be ok (at least until the bacon was done).

This was when my mother informed me we were having eggs huevos, or eggs jalapenos, or eggs lawnmower. I forget, but it was something Mexican inspired. Here it be:

This was actually really good. I used to despise runny eggs, but now I love runny eggs! Under the eggs were beans and peppers and a tortilla. To the right is that delicious bacon. The food was good, but it was awkward to eat. I wanted to pick it up like a taco, but the egg was too runny. I had to eat it with a fork instead. The Mexicans sure do know how to make a confusing breakfast! Also, this blog post was riddled with racism. 8/10 Jeffs.

Sorry, I'm Lazy

Ok ok, I realize I've been slacking. But honestly, I'm pretty surprised how many of you out there read this blog. I created the blog to 1) write like an idiot and 2) make you all jealous that I eat like a fucking king.

I wish I could blame my recent lack of posts on me being busy, but I don't do shit. I was just really lazy, and while updating a blog doesn't sound like a whole lot, I am an intellectual. Writing like an asshole is actually difficult for me sometimes. So if we're keeping count, I eat better than you, I'm smarter than you....

No but really, in 100% seriousness, I truly appreciate all of you out there who read this. People message me all the time telling me to update or how much they love it, people I never would have imagined. And that feels pretty cool.

And even though I haven't been updating, I've still been logging some of my better meals. So here's a quick 2 week update, wrapped in one post. Enjoy!

This is eggplant parm my stepdad made. Mother grew these big, gay, purple vegetables in her garden, and my stepdad diced them up, fried them, and covered them with cheese. Sounds fuckin tasty to me. The pasta was seriously miserable though. It was whole wheat, which is an understandably healthy choice when your main course is fried and cheesy, but this brand was disgusting. 8.5/10 Jeffs.

Steak and potatoes. What more can I say? 9/10 Jeffs.

This is my dog, Royce. He licks the air a lot. He is not food.

Swordfish steak with homemade mango salsa and fried green tomatoes. Apparently, the only way we eat vegetables anymore is if they're fried, and I'm ok with that. 8/10 Jeffs.